Pisces, Enneagram 6, ENFJ About Me
Hello, hello! Trust is a requirement in life coaching, don’t you agree? You need to know that this process is real, honest, and safe. I see that.
Trust that I will not spill YOUR secrets. I follow HIPPA guidelines, and I’m a vault. Sessions are your safe space.
Trust that I will not judge you. I’ve been there, done that, or have friends that have. We’re people, people!
Trust that I know what I’m doing and I’m real. I’ve got the formal education and personal growth that back me up.
This will be a trusting relationship. Let me tell you a story.
Well, most of my teens – twenties, I had no idea what the hell I was doing with my life. My love life was dramatic. I had no idea what direction to take for a career – only that I wanted to help others. I was emotional, tense, anxious, and CONFUSED! As a Pisces, I knew I would always feel conflicted and indecisive – err, so I thought at the time. I felt I should feel like a grown up, and I didn’t feel that way. I wanted someone, or something to tell me what to do. It didn’t happen.
I was at a breaking point – I had a break down. One of those nasty, can’t get out of bed ones, call the doctor because I’m depressed ones. Hitting rock bottom, made me realize I needed to wake the hell up, and fix this hot mess.
Would you like details of this break down? At this point, I had a very contentious relationship with my daughter’s father, was fighting daily with my husband, would do anything to prevent a mistake – including taking no action, had horrible self-talk, emotional control was non-existent, and there was mass loss of important friendships. I self-doubted every decision I made – or better yet (worse yet?), I couldn’t decide. I had anxiety attacks, and felt directionless and clueless as to why this terrible stuff kept happening. To top it off, I did not feel a connection to the daughter I loved deeply.
I decided to put my big girl panties on and fix others.
That was a fucking failure.
I decided to put my big girl panties on and fix myself.
That was a massive success.
The process was slow and rewarding. The process came in bursts of starts and stops as I had to go through the stages of grief, and the removal of shame, while opening myself up to vulnerability, and setting boundaries. Self-discovery took time too. Sometimes I could be guided on what to work on, yet most of the time, I had to create the awareness myself.
I have a working co-parenting relationship with my daughter’s father. My husband and I are happier, with rare respectful fights that I / we can easily mend. I like and love myself. Self-care is a priority to me. Anxiety is managed, as well as mostly prevented. I make damn good decisions all the time, with respectful time frames. Sometimes I fail, and I congratulate myself on mistakes as I wise up. I’ve developed emotional agility. Self-talk is positive. I’ve made and kept nurturing friendships. My relationship and connection with my daughter is great, even more amazing as she is hitting her teen years. I feel happier, mindful, grateful, and clear. I’ve set up healthy boundaries for myself and my business. Oh ya! I started a business, as I have found my life purpose.
How I earned my stripes
The process of self-discovery and self-love began with going to college. I was in my early 30s, and took the Myers Briggs test – to help me discover what career would suit my personality. A theme was one of helping others. During this time, a traumatic life event (real this time, not made up in my head) occurred when I suffered a miscarriage. I found out about the miscarriage during the sonogram. The sonographer was invaluable during this time, she was kind, nurturing, let me talk and cry, and encouraged me to breathe. She changed the direction of my life – who would have thought?
So, I decided I wanted to be like her – a sonographer. I researched and found I needed a hands-on patient care degree first. I looked at nursing, physical therapy, and occupational therapy (OT). Observing OT, I thought, wow, they need to rename this profession “Danielle”. It spoke to me deeply. I enrolled and was accepting into the competitive program.
During this time, I went into counseling. The anxiety was becoming too much – remember, I couldn’t fail. It was not an option for me. This was not a good recipe in school. Counseling lasted about 12 months and I had mild success with self-improvement. The problem here was the continual looking and working in the past, and I did not like going to the past – I didn’t like who I was. Plus, it created more fights with my husband.
In the OT program, I experienced significant personal development. It goes back to helping yourself before you help others. I developed a good work / life balance. After graduation, I started practicing OT. As a medical provider, I must complete continuing education, where I took a small course in coaching. I used coaching in my practice and it was more powerful than I could image.
As a nerd, that needed more information, I looked into obtaining a certification, and found a program that was a good match. Before and during the program we had to have a coach. I was resistant to this. Even with a hot mess of a life, I thought I had nothing to be coached on. Ha-ha, right? However, coaching is so potent, that even with high resistance, the awareness started. And the awareness built, and I fucking flourished under it. The Enneagram came into play here and amazingly it was connected to my astrological sign, and my Myers Briggs profile. The Enneagram made it possible for me to accept and experience the new-found fact that personalities are adaptable. Coaching is all about where you want to be, and moving forward. This approach was much more effective, for me. In coaching, I heavily focused on my relationship to self, and to others, as well as move through my fears.
Together and moving forward
Today I hold the accreditation for coaching, I still practice OT, and I take continuing education in coaching and OT.
And I still have a coach, as I am not done improving.
Do we have any similarities?
Do you have questions?
I would love to answer questions you have! Feel free to leave a comment below!